Leave the Memorial in Memorial Day

©2013 by LeeZard

People say it all the time, "Happy Memorial Day." To me, that's an oxymoron. Barbecues, road trips and picnics aside, Memorial Day is a somber and serious occasion.

From http://www.usmemorialday.org

“Memorial Day, originally called Decoration Day, is a day of remembrance for those who have died in our nation's service. There are many stories as to its actual beginnings, with over two-dozen cities and towns laying claim to being the birthplace of Memorial Day. There is also evidence that organized women's groups in the South were decorating graves before the end of the Civil War: a hymn published in 1867, "Kneel Where Our Loves are Sleeping" by Nella L. Sweet carried the dedication ‘To The Ladies of the South who are Decorating the Graves of the Confederate Dead.’

 Memorial Day was officially proclaimed on 5 May 1868 by General John Logan, national commander of the Grand Army of the Republic and was first observed on 30 May 1868, when flowers were placed on the graves of Union and Confederate soldiers at Arlington National Cemetery. The first state to officially recognize the holiday was New York in 1873. By 1890 it was recognized by all of the northern states. The South refused to acknowledge the day, honoring their dead on separate days until after World War I (when the holiday changed from honoring just those who died fighting in the Civil War to honoring Americans who died fighting in any war).”

From Time Magazine:

"Yale University historian David Blight places the first Memorial Day in April 1865, when a group of former slaves gathered at a Charleston, S.C., horse track turned Confederate prison where more than 250 Union soldiers had died. Digging up the soldiers' mass grave, they interred the bodies in individual graves, built a 100-yd. fence around them and erected an archway over the entrance bearing the words "Martyrs of the Race Course." On May 1, 1865, some 10,000 black Charleston residents, white missionaries, teachers, schoolchildren and Union troops marched around the Planters' Race Course, singing and carrying armfuls of roses. Gathering in the graveyard, the crowd watched five black preachers recite scripture and a children's choir sing spirituals and The Star-Spangled Banner While the story is largely forgotten today, some historians consider the gathering the first Memorial Day."

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Note to whatever’s left of Richard Nixon’s “Silent Majority:” Most of us were not then and have never been “Communists,” or “Pinkos” or any other epithet you hurled at anyone opposed to the Vietnam War. Many of us were against that war only while others of us are against war, period. That does not mean, however, that any of us were/are unpatriotic.

Phew, glad to finally get THAT off my chest. “But why now?” You might ask. There are several reasons.

As we all know, history repeats itself. Can you say, “War in Iraq?” Yes, there are similarities - politicians lying, young people dying thousands of miles away in a war we can't win.

I wrote the following in 1966. It holds true today:

He’s a boy.

You’ve given him a gun,

You taught him how to shoot.

You’ve given him a knife,

You taught him how to kill.

You sent him off to war,

You taught him how to hate.

You call him a man.

He’s a boy.

A boy who can shoot,

Kill,

And hate.

Iraq War Dead

But, there he differences between that war and the Vietnam War and they are striking. The anger levels during Vietnam were off the charts on both sides of the issue. When Dubya and Dick “The Thug” Cheney lied to get us into Iraq I was chagrined at the lack of anger. Another major difference is the way we treated returning Vietnam vets (who were vilified by the Anti-War Movement) and the way we treat Mid-East and Afghani vets (with respect and gratitude).

Vietnam War Memorial

I, for one, never hated the poor grunts that were (Lyndon) Johnson’s and Nixon’s cannon fodder in Southeast Asia. My brother was in the first wave of Marines to land in Vietnam in the mid-60s and nearly died. He came back very changed, politically and personally. I had a pretty good insight into the price paid by those who fought in Vietnam.

I’m still against war but ever since then, whenever I’m at a Starbucks (or any other coffee place) and see a man or woman in uniform (and, since 9/11, first responders), I always buy their drink and add a “Thank you for your service.” 

While the plague of war persists I recognize that we must have a strong force to defend our freedoms but wars are NOT the fault of those who fight and die in them.

When I was growing up in Laurelton, in the NYC Borough of Queens, there was a Memorial Day Parade through the town every year. It stopped at every church and synagogue where a bugler would blow Taps and a moment of silence observed. One year I had the honor of leading my Boy Scout troop in the march but I didn’t get it back then. I do now.

Have a great Memorial Day weekend but please let’s not forget what this is all about.